of the killer tomatoes!
Just kidding. Actually it was the attack of my favorite food of all time, sausage and egg sandwich.
(my dad and I used to love to watch that movie.)
I swear to God, at 10:30 last night I thought I was having a heart attack. I was on the front porch working on my homework and all of a sudden I got this really uncomfortable feeling in my chest, and my left arm hurt. So did my right shoulder. Went away after about 5 minutes.
Then it came back, and I went surfing the internet for symptoms of a heart attack. I had most of them, but thought the shortness of breath was because it hurt to breathe in, not just couldn't catch my breath. My heart rate was fine, too.
Went to the store at 3am because I thought it could be indigestion. Dyspepsia. See? That's what I freaking get for using that word in my facebook status the other day. Bought two rolls of Rolaids, chewed half of one on the way home.
They didn't like my stomach too well. They, along with everything else, decided to vacate the premises. Chewed the other half, drank a glass of milk. Why do I NEVER remember that milk does not taste good on the way up?
I fell asleep watching Sportscenter around 3:30. Got up at 6:30, and my chest didn't hurt but my shoulders still did. I was going to wait until a decent hour to call someone and ask if I should go to the ER.
(oh, I had to do a load of white clothes while waiting...can't go to the emergency room without clean undies.)
At 8:15 I called Erin. She's the only one I knew would be up (she was somewhere cleaning!), plus her husband is a paramedic. Told her all of my symptoms, and she called him for me.
The consensus was I had a gall bladder attack. Between his expertise and her same exact thing a few years ago, I figured I'd believe them. Thank goodness. With no insurance that would have cost thousands to tell me there was nothing they could do. But then I'd need Xanax for the panic attack that would follow, so maybe it all would have worked out well?
Around 11 this morning I started feeling better. Chalk that up to the four advil that were kind enough not to start World War 6 with my stomach.
There may be a bright side to this....I'm afraid to eat anything, and right now I'm still a little queasy. Good combo for a diet!
(I'm so kidding....do not starve yourself to lose weight! It's not healthy and it will only work for a while until your body starts conserving fat.)
7.19.2009
7.16.2009
There are still good guys out there
Last week, my dad calls me to ask if I could find someone on the internet. He'd been having problems with his computer when he was trying to search. (dad, it's called being old and not knowing what to do, but go on...) He gives me this guys name, approximate year of birth, and social security number. (?) Tells me to try the East Coast, that's where he probably ended up after the service.
Ok. But why? Not that I really need a reason to help Pops, but having some strange guys social security number is a little unnerving. What if he's this 6-10', 300-lb guy that gets pissed I have his SSN? My dad laughs. And then starts the story.....
My aunt and uncle own a 1967 Chevrolet Chevelle that they are trying to sell. When they first purchased the car years ago, left in the glove box was a paystub from the Army and a work ID badge from the original owner. He had bought the car off the LINE - they had printed his name in the owners manual.
I call my dad back with the phone number that I found for the original owner. Then I forget about the whole thing. Until tonight when my aunt calls me.
Mr. Strohl had died 14 years ago of a massive heart attack. His wife is still alive, and my aunt told her the reason for calling. She is awaiting a liver transplant, and wasn't interested in the car, but her brother-in-law collects old cars and she'll have him call my aunt. He calls, and decides he's buying the car.
Well, he didn't feel right. Mr. Strohl's daughter lives next door to him, so he went over to talk to her and her husband to offer them the chance to buy the car. Told the husband that he couldn't live with himself if he bought the car out from under them. The husband calls my aunt, and tells her to give him 24 hours and he's going to come up with the money to buy the car. Then he tells my aunt the reason he's so hell-bent on buying this car for his wife.
The daughter was 16 years old when her father had his heart attack, and died in front of her. She's never gotten over it, and they named their first-born son Joseph William after her father. Her 30th birthday is in September. He's going to surprise her with her father's car.
It actually gets better - the husband called his brother-in-law (also the son of the owner) and he's got PICTURES of the whole family in front of the car. A lot of them, 15 I think. Now her 30th birthday party will be decorated with blown up pictures of her family and the car her husband has bought her for her birthday.
Awesome.
Makes me feel good that there are still good people out there. The sweet husband to think of doing that for his wife, the uncle that couldn't buy it without their permission, and my aunt and uncle for thinking about the original owner. :)
Ok. But why? Not that I really need a reason to help Pops, but having some strange guys social security number is a little unnerving. What if he's this 6-10', 300-lb guy that gets pissed I have his SSN? My dad laughs. And then starts the story.....
My aunt and uncle own a 1967 Chevrolet Chevelle that they are trying to sell. When they first purchased the car years ago, left in the glove box was a paystub from the Army and a work ID badge from the original owner. He had bought the car off the LINE - they had printed his name in the owners manual.
I call my dad back with the phone number that I found for the original owner. Then I forget about the whole thing. Until tonight when my aunt calls me.
Mr. Strohl had died 14 years ago of a massive heart attack. His wife is still alive, and my aunt told her the reason for calling. She is awaiting a liver transplant, and wasn't interested in the car, but her brother-in-law collects old cars and she'll have him call my aunt. He calls, and decides he's buying the car.
Well, he didn't feel right. Mr. Strohl's daughter lives next door to him, so he went over to talk to her and her husband to offer them the chance to buy the car. Told the husband that he couldn't live with himself if he bought the car out from under them. The husband calls my aunt, and tells her to give him 24 hours and he's going to come up with the money to buy the car. Then he tells my aunt the reason he's so hell-bent on buying this car for his wife.
The daughter was 16 years old when her father had his heart attack, and died in front of her. She's never gotten over it, and they named their first-born son Joseph William after her father. Her 30th birthday is in September. He's going to surprise her with her father's car.
It actually gets better - the husband called his brother-in-law (also the son of the owner) and he's got PICTURES of the whole family in front of the car. A lot of them, 15 I think. Now her 30th birthday party will be decorated with blown up pictures of her family and the car her husband has bought her for her birthday.
Awesome.
Makes me feel good that there are still good people out there. The sweet husband to think of doing that for his wife, the uncle that couldn't buy it without their permission, and my aunt and uncle for thinking about the original owner. :)
7.11.2009
end of my rope
This week I started school. Had the conversation with the boy about how I'll be damned if I'm going to school to make our lives better while he sits on his ass doing nothing.
Then the mail from the mortgage company comes. While we have June's payment in the bank, dumbass decides that he isn't paying it. His logic actually makes sense, the company won't help you until you are behind. That's great - but now you have to explain why the mortgage payment is in the bank when they see the bank statements. Most likely you've just screwed your chance at being able to re-work the loan. I hope not, because you are still refusing to work and I don't know how we'll survive after August.
For the last 7...going on 8 months, I've begged, pleaded, yelled, left, threatened, cried, and so on for him to get a job. Nothing. The feeble attempts he's made shouldn't even count as looking. I understand you are depressed but COME ON. Enough already. He's killing me. He's making my daughter hate me because I can't stop resenting him. I can't keep my mouth shut forever. From November to January I didn't say a word about finding a job. Now it's JULY. I bit through my tounge somewhere around March.
And then he won't let me study. I had to part with some of the little money I do have to make them go away tonight. I'm trying to learn - online at that - medical terminology. Neither of them will leave me alone, but the boy is evil. I'm sitting here today listening to a lesson with headphones on taking notes. I see him sitting next to me trying to get my attention, but I'm ignoring him. Oh, he didn't like that much, poked me in the arm 1000 times until I looked at him. Seriously? Can't you see that I'm in the middle of something? Want to know what he wanted? He couldn't wait 10 minutes to find out the showtimes for Bruno. Fuck you.
I begged him the other night to go have an affair so I could kick his ass out to her house. Desperate, am I?
Then the mail from the mortgage company comes. While we have June's payment in the bank, dumbass decides that he isn't paying it. His logic actually makes sense, the company won't help you until you are behind. That's great - but now you have to explain why the mortgage payment is in the bank when they see the bank statements. Most likely you've just screwed your chance at being able to re-work the loan. I hope not, because you are still refusing to work and I don't know how we'll survive after August.
For the last 7...going on 8 months, I've begged, pleaded, yelled, left, threatened, cried, and so on for him to get a job. Nothing. The feeble attempts he's made shouldn't even count as looking. I understand you are depressed but COME ON. Enough already. He's killing me. He's making my daughter hate me because I can't stop resenting him. I can't keep my mouth shut forever. From November to January I didn't say a word about finding a job. Now it's JULY. I bit through my tounge somewhere around March.
And then he won't let me study. I had to part with some of the little money I do have to make them go away tonight. I'm trying to learn - online at that - medical terminology. Neither of them will leave me alone, but the boy is evil. I'm sitting here today listening to a lesson with headphones on taking notes. I see him sitting next to me trying to get my attention, but I'm ignoring him. Oh, he didn't like that much, poked me in the arm 1000 times until I looked at him. Seriously? Can't you see that I'm in the middle of something? Want to know what he wanted? He couldn't wait 10 minutes to find out the showtimes for Bruno. Fuck you.
I begged him the other night to go have an affair so I could kick his ass out to her house. Desperate, am I?
7.05.2009
Cinderella
I met Amber when she was six years old. Her father and step-mother used to be friends of ours. Amber was the most adult 6-year old you have ever met. From the first day I met her, I wanted her.
Her father isn't a bad person. He would just rather avoid confrontation than stand up for his children. Her mother couldn't provide a stable life for her, so she left Amber with her father and his new 17-year old wife.
Evil step-mother is the epitome of his wife. Never has she made Amber feel like she was her own child. Two weeks after meeting me, Amber was spending most weekends at my house. I loved it. We had so much fun, but she loved it because someone actually acted like they cared about her.
Then I got a job, Amber went to live with her mom, and her father and his wife developed a habit. That habit is the reason that we stopped speaking to/hanging out with them. Amber eventually came back to live with her dad. Then she went down the road to her grandparents, the ones that really love her.
The past few months, while Sean isn't working, we've had more time available to spend with friends. Amber showed up at a cookout we were having a few months ago, and since then she's been at almost every get-together we have. Like yesterday at the lake.
Since I've wanted to raise her all these years (she's 17 now) I talk to her like she's my kid. I was giving her hell asking when she was going to sign up for GED classes. "Do you need my help to get started?"
Yes, she says. Ok. I need help getting my social security card and Georgia ID so that I can register for the GED classes, but my dad won't take me. My immediate thought - and I can't say it didn't pass my lips - was, "What the hell?" He won't take her, said he wasn't going to help her since she dropped out of school.
Now I don't understand that thinking. Your child has to have an ID and SS card to get into GED classes. She also needs those two things to get a job. By not allowing her to do so, you have just decided - for her - that she's going to get pregnant by her dumbass boyfriend, move in with his family, and live a life like you and your asshole wife. NICE.
Amber and I decided that tuesday I would take her to get what she needs. Then we'll get her signed up for the classes, which I offered to pay half. *I'm broke, but I'll use my grant money and it's only 50 bucks...can't think of a better way to spend that* I was going to call her dad tonight and ask why he wasn't going to do it, and let him know that I was. That's not going to happen now.
I guess his wife, evil step-mother, was pissed they weren't invited to the lake yesterday. Oh well. We walked into our friends house last night and she was sitting on the couch, and rolled her eyes when I walked in. She should be careful, I really wanted to slap the shit out of her so hard her wall-eye would move. I thought better of it, there were children there.
Now I'm just going to take your step-daughter, the one you can't stand, to make her life better. To give her a chance at a life at least half-better than yours. To let her know that someone loves her enough to want her to succeed in life. My only problem is that I'm not her mother. But I'll damn well try to be since the two she has don't give a shit.
And if confronted by her "parents", I'm going to say one thing and then walk away: "I will never apologize to you for helping your child have a better life."
Her father isn't a bad person. He would just rather avoid confrontation than stand up for his children. Her mother couldn't provide a stable life for her, so she left Amber with her father and his new 17-year old wife.
Evil step-mother is the epitome of his wife. Never has she made Amber feel like she was her own child. Two weeks after meeting me, Amber was spending most weekends at my house. I loved it. We had so much fun, but she loved it because someone actually acted like they cared about her.
Then I got a job, Amber went to live with her mom, and her father and his wife developed a habit. That habit is the reason that we stopped speaking to/hanging out with them. Amber eventually came back to live with her dad. Then she went down the road to her grandparents, the ones that really love her.
The past few months, while Sean isn't working, we've had more time available to spend with friends. Amber showed up at a cookout we were having a few months ago, and since then she's been at almost every get-together we have. Like yesterday at the lake.
Since I've wanted to raise her all these years (she's 17 now) I talk to her like she's my kid. I was giving her hell asking when she was going to sign up for GED classes. "Do you need my help to get started?"
Yes, she says. Ok. I need help getting my social security card and Georgia ID so that I can register for the GED classes, but my dad won't take me. My immediate thought - and I can't say it didn't pass my lips - was, "What the hell?" He won't take her, said he wasn't going to help her since she dropped out of school.
Now I don't understand that thinking. Your child has to have an ID and SS card to get into GED classes. She also needs those two things to get a job. By not allowing her to do so, you have just decided - for her - that she's going to get pregnant by her dumbass boyfriend, move in with his family, and live a life like you and your asshole wife. NICE.
Amber and I decided that tuesday I would take her to get what she needs. Then we'll get her signed up for the classes, which I offered to pay half. *I'm broke, but I'll use my grant money and it's only 50 bucks...can't think of a better way to spend that* I was going to call her dad tonight and ask why he wasn't going to do it, and let him know that I was. That's not going to happen now.
I guess his wife, evil step-mother, was pissed they weren't invited to the lake yesterday. Oh well. We walked into our friends house last night and she was sitting on the couch, and rolled her eyes when I walked in. She should be careful, I really wanted to slap the shit out of her so hard her wall-eye would move. I thought better of it, there were children there.
Now I'm just going to take your step-daughter, the one you can't stand, to make her life better. To give her a chance at a life at least half-better than yours. To let her know that someone loves her enough to want her to succeed in life. My only problem is that I'm not her mother. But I'll damn well try to be since the two she has don't give a shit.
And if confronted by her "parents", I'm going to say one thing and then walk away: "I will never apologize to you for helping your child have a better life."
6.24.2009
15th Reunion
Where is the most logical place to hold a high school reunion? See, my line of thinking is that you hold it in the town where you graduated. Right? Yeah. The brilliant masterminds of my class want to have it in Northern Virginia. Except we graduated in Williamsburg, some 100+ miles south.
We had the 10th during the homecoming weekend, which is actually a good idea. That's in October. In our facebook group, I started a thread about the reunion. Asked if it was going to be homecoming weekend, because my little brother's class is also having their reunion that weekend. I even mentioned that I don't get to see him much and I couldn't wait to hang out with him.
Today I e-mailed another classmate that had volunteered himself (along with me!) to plan the 15th. E-mailed my "cousin" because she's planning my little brother's and I wanted to know what they are doing. Tonight, the classmate IM'd me and told me the class president is talking to him now, letting him know the details. They have planned it for the weekend of Aug. 7th, basically a month away, in Herndon, Va. Since I don't know where that is, I won't be going.
August 7th is also my daughter's first day of school in a brand new school. No way is she missing that, and if I waited until she got out of school it would be midnight before we got to Va. Not gonna happen, and she's going with me.
In writing this out, I've come to a conclusion, and let my partner in crime know. He and I are going to plan something for homecoming weekend, in WILLIAMSBURG, and deal with the wrath later. Not that I'm at all worried about it, I live 600 miles away from these crazy people planning the reunion.
Plus, I'll get to hang out with my little brother and all his friends that I used to babysit. I love hanging out with them. For some reason, they all treat me like a Queen. I can sit in one spot and never be without a drink for hours. :) I love those boys!
We had the 10th during the homecoming weekend, which is actually a good idea. That's in October. In our facebook group, I started a thread about the reunion. Asked if it was going to be homecoming weekend, because my little brother's class is also having their reunion that weekend. I even mentioned that I don't get to see him much and I couldn't wait to hang out with him.
Today I e-mailed another classmate that had volunteered himself (along with me!) to plan the 15th. E-mailed my "cousin" because she's planning my little brother's and I wanted to know what they are doing. Tonight, the classmate IM'd me and told me the class president is talking to him now, letting him know the details. They have planned it for the weekend of Aug. 7th, basically a month away, in Herndon, Va. Since I don't know where that is, I won't be going.
August 7th is also my daughter's first day of school in a brand new school. No way is she missing that, and if I waited until she got out of school it would be midnight before we got to Va. Not gonna happen, and she's going with me.
In writing this out, I've come to a conclusion, and let my partner in crime know. He and I are going to plan something for homecoming weekend, in WILLIAMSBURG, and deal with the wrath later. Not that I'm at all worried about it, I live 600 miles away from these crazy people planning the reunion.
Plus, I'll get to hang out with my little brother and all his friends that I used to babysit. I love hanging out with them. For some reason, they all treat me like a Queen. I can sit in one spot and never be without a drink for hours. :) I love those boys!
6.22.2009
Perez Hilton was Wrong
I've watched the videos that will.i.am and Perez have released this morning after the fight at the awards show last night. While I'll be the first to admit that the manager of Black Eye Peas was wrong for punching Perez Hilton, if you run your mouth enough, someone is going to resort to violence. If Perez went 5 years (like he says) without someone punching his ass, he was pretty lucky. People are crazy.
Here's the part that bothers me, the reason for the blog. Perez Hilton said he called will.i.am a faggot to piss him off. Why is it ok for you to use a word that you would crucify a straight person for saying?
Let's all remember how GLADD and Hilton went after Eminem when he said faggot, and Eminem had to go on to explain that when he says that, he's trying to insult straight people. No matter how Eminem (or anyone else) explained it, he was wrong, and GLADD called for a boycott of his album.
I'm waiting to see if GLADD makes Perez apologize, or if they stand behind him. If they don't make him apologize, they are all "disgusting human beings". If you want someone else to issue an apology for using the word faggot, then you need to do the same. You can't call out others if you don't first call out yourself.
Don't get me wrong, I like Perez Hilton. I think he's funny, crude, and actually gets to the bottom of tabloid rumors. I just think that if you want the world to change, be more accepting, then you shouldn't use words that you find offensive. It makes you non-credible.
Here's the part that bothers me, the reason for the blog. Perez Hilton said he called will.i.am a faggot to piss him off. Why is it ok for you to use a word that you would crucify a straight person for saying?
Let's all remember how GLADD and Hilton went after Eminem when he said faggot, and Eminem had to go on to explain that when he says that, he's trying to insult straight people. No matter how Eminem (or anyone else) explained it, he was wrong, and GLADD called for a boycott of his album.
I'm waiting to see if GLADD makes Perez apologize, or if they stand behind him. If they don't make him apologize, they are all "disgusting human beings". If you want someone else to issue an apology for using the word faggot, then you need to do the same. You can't call out others if you don't first call out yourself.
Don't get me wrong, I like Perez Hilton. I think he's funny, crude, and actually gets to the bottom of tabloid rumors. I just think that if you want the world to change, be more accepting, then you shouldn't use words that you find offensive. It makes you non-credible.
6.20.2009
Wal-Mart charges more depending on the store!
Yesterday, I decided to go to Athens. Any time I go to Athens or Augusta, I like to go to Wal-Mart to look at their yarn selections. They have more of a variety of colors at the bigger city stores.
The Wal-Mart in Thomson would be considered a rural store. They have the food and stuff, but the store is smaller and doesn't have as good a selection of items as other stores. Whatever, it has what I need and cheaper than the grocery store.
In Athens, the first place I go is the crafts. I'm not happy with the purples I have for a blanket I'm planning, so I wanted to see which colors of yarn they had available. Imagine my surprise when I see the price of the yarn: $2.00. The same exact item at Thomson's store is $2.47. I'm positive the two dollar price is NOT a sale. They would have had roll back signs or red tags or something on the price. I bought 7 skeins of yarn. I saved $3.50.
Then it started to bother me. I'd like to know why people in rural areas - statistically poorer than metro areas - are made to pay more? Supposedly Wally World buys in bulk to save money...but why aren't the prices the same? They didn't buy yarn for one store at a certain price and another lot of yarn for another store at a different price. They bought all the yarn together at THE SAME PRICE.
I'd like to bring it to Wal-Mart's attention. Actually, I'm one of those people that want to have the MEDIA ask that question. I just think it's unfair that poorer people are made to pay more for the same product at different locations of the chain. Doesn't seem very nice.
(and I know all the stories about wal-mart being like this. Just another example.)
The Wal-Mart in Thomson would be considered a rural store. They have the food and stuff, but the store is smaller and doesn't have as good a selection of items as other stores. Whatever, it has what I need and cheaper than the grocery store.
In Athens, the first place I go is the crafts. I'm not happy with the purples I have for a blanket I'm planning, so I wanted to see which colors of yarn they had available. Imagine my surprise when I see the price of the yarn: $2.00. The same exact item at Thomson's store is $2.47. I'm positive the two dollar price is NOT a sale. They would have had roll back signs or red tags or something on the price. I bought 7 skeins of yarn. I saved $3.50.
Then it started to bother me. I'd like to know why people in rural areas - statistically poorer than metro areas - are made to pay more? Supposedly Wally World buys in bulk to save money...but why aren't the prices the same? They didn't buy yarn for one store at a certain price and another lot of yarn for another store at a different price. They bought all the yarn together at THE SAME PRICE.
I'd like to bring it to Wal-Mart's attention. Actually, I'm one of those people that want to have the MEDIA ask that question. I just think it's unfair that poorer people are made to pay more for the same product at different locations of the chain. Doesn't seem very nice.
(and I know all the stories about wal-mart being like this. Just another example.)
Crazy Bitch
I don't quite know where this is going. I'm really tired. Exhausted, actually. My mind is racing, my heart feels like it wants to grow legs and run out of my chest. I should be asleep because I have a Weight Watchers meeting in the morning.
That makes me nervous, too. I've gained 10 lbs in the 7 months the ass has been refusing to work. One of the main reasons for going back to school. Other than the important one of realizing I can't count on my husband. I need to get out of the house and away from my refrigerator.
Tonight I caught the end of My Dog Skip. I shouldn't do that to myself since I own two Jack Russell's. It just made me sad, and then the tears came. Couldn't stop them. Not because of the movie. The last few weeks whenever I've wanted to cry my eyes burned. It physically hurt to cry. So I didn't. Let it all build up. Cried for an hour straight. *sighs* Feel a little better, but now I'm just angry. Imagine that. ;)
I don't like being this mean, bitchy person. Usually I'm laid back until you piss me off. It's hard to sit in this house with someone that you resent more and more each passing day. Just makes me think of greener pastures. Not like there are any, but I still think.
I'm not good at relationships. I'm the fatal attraction chick. Not really, but I'd like for someone to love me. Treat me well. They don't have to be rich - I'm not high maintenance. Well, maybe. I want attention and affection, appreciation and support. Does that make me impossible to please?
Or does that mean that the people in my past just didn't care enough? See, I think that if you truly love someone, those things I want shouldn't be a burden. It shouldn't make me a bitch because I have issues and I'm a little needier than most. My quirky issues should be the things that you love about me.
Don't get me wrong. When I think about past people that I've been involved with, there are one or two that I'm glad - now - that I wasn't a target for their love. Took me a loooong time to realize that, but I learned. Now I can't tell you how happy I am they didn't love me.
Then there are people that I think were stupid to let me go. I wonder to this day if people ever tell them they were dumb. That they let the best person for them get away. That they should have treated me better than they did. I doubt it. Boys never sit around discussing feelings and relationships, do they?
That makes me nervous, too. I've gained 10 lbs in the 7 months the ass has been refusing to work. One of the main reasons for going back to school. Other than the important one of realizing I can't count on my husband. I need to get out of the house and away from my refrigerator.
Tonight I caught the end of My Dog Skip. I shouldn't do that to myself since I own two Jack Russell's. It just made me sad, and then the tears came. Couldn't stop them. Not because of the movie. The last few weeks whenever I've wanted to cry my eyes burned. It physically hurt to cry. So I didn't. Let it all build up. Cried for an hour straight. *sighs* Feel a little better, but now I'm just angry. Imagine that. ;)
I don't like being this mean, bitchy person. Usually I'm laid back until you piss me off. It's hard to sit in this house with someone that you resent more and more each passing day. Just makes me think of greener pastures. Not like there are any, but I still think.
I'm not good at relationships. I'm the fatal attraction chick. Not really, but I'd like for someone to love me. Treat me well. They don't have to be rich - I'm not high maintenance. Well, maybe. I want attention and affection, appreciation and support. Does that make me impossible to please?
Or does that mean that the people in my past just didn't care enough? See, I think that if you truly love someone, those things I want shouldn't be a burden. It shouldn't make me a bitch because I have issues and I'm a little needier than most. My quirky issues should be the things that you love about me.
Don't get me wrong. When I think about past people that I've been involved with, there are one or two that I'm glad - now - that I wasn't a target for their love. Took me a loooong time to realize that, but I learned. Now I can't tell you how happy I am they didn't love me.
Then there are people that I think were stupid to let me go. I wonder to this day if people ever tell them they were dumb. That they let the best person for them get away. That they should have treated me better than they did. I doubt it. Boys never sit around discussing feelings and relationships, do they?
6.16.2009
It's only Tuesday
Monday was pretty swell. Just kidding. I'd like to either fast forward life until things get better, or time travel back to this time last year. Life was ok then.
Let's see, where should I start? My husband has been laid off since November. Thankfully he gets unemployment, but that isn't much when you are used to bringing home at least $1000 every week. It has been a daily battle to get him to look for a job. Yeah, I get the "I'm depressed, it's scary to look for a new job" thing he has going on. The problem is it's been 7 months. Way past time to pick yourself up and start supporting your family.
Today's argument with that nice situation has to do with food stamps. I have no intention of applying for them. Why? Because it just enables him to sit here all day and not look for a job. I can hear him now...."we are both getting unemployment, you are getting a grant to go to school, and with the food stamps, I'd be able to sit here for another 16 or so weeks before I have to work."
If he was actively seeking work - and lets be honest here, he's a truck driver and there are jobs out there to be found - at least two days a week, three to four hours a day, I'd be the first in line to apply. He isn't trying, and I'm not giving him a reason to mooch off the government like a white trash asshole. He can be an asshole all day long if he wants. Just get a job already.
Speaking of unemployment, I had to sit in that stinking office for over an hour yesterday before someone helped me. When they finally got around to dealing with me and after the "you are really patient" remark, I was assured I will receive my unemployment benefits this week. They wouldn't tell me the what the "issue" was with my application, just that they fixed it and I should get paid this week. Good. You owe me three weeks now.
I went to the college to change a course and add one before I went to the unemployment office. The class I needed to change wasn't on their list because it was out of a different campus, but I could register for it online. By the time I was finished at the unemployment office, the 30 minute drive home and get logged onto the system, there was ONE seat left in the class. So I stole it. Yay. Now I don't have to sit in a job skills class once a week for three hours...the class is online.
Not too bad. One thing out of 75 went my way Monday. Today I'm going to buy some Tylenol PM. This not sleeping thing I've had going on for three/four weeks now is starting to get annoying. Maybe tomorrow will be better. ha!
Let's see, where should I start? My husband has been laid off since November. Thankfully he gets unemployment, but that isn't much when you are used to bringing home at least $1000 every week. It has been a daily battle to get him to look for a job. Yeah, I get the "I'm depressed, it's scary to look for a new job" thing he has going on. The problem is it's been 7 months. Way past time to pick yourself up and start supporting your family.
Today's argument with that nice situation has to do with food stamps. I have no intention of applying for them. Why? Because it just enables him to sit here all day and not look for a job. I can hear him now...."we are both getting unemployment, you are getting a grant to go to school, and with the food stamps, I'd be able to sit here for another 16 or so weeks before I have to work."
If he was actively seeking work - and lets be honest here, he's a truck driver and there are jobs out there to be found - at least two days a week, three to four hours a day, I'd be the first in line to apply. He isn't trying, and I'm not giving him a reason to mooch off the government like a white trash asshole. He can be an asshole all day long if he wants. Just get a job already.
Speaking of unemployment, I had to sit in that stinking office for over an hour yesterday before someone helped me. When they finally got around to dealing with me and after the "you are really patient" remark, I was assured I will receive my unemployment benefits this week. They wouldn't tell me the what the "issue" was with my application, just that they fixed it and I should get paid this week. Good. You owe me three weeks now.
I went to the college to change a course and add one before I went to the unemployment office. The class I needed to change wasn't on their list because it was out of a different campus, but I could register for it online. By the time I was finished at the unemployment office, the 30 minute drive home and get logged onto the system, there was ONE seat left in the class. So I stole it. Yay. Now I don't have to sit in a job skills class once a week for three hours...the class is online.
Not too bad. One thing out of 75 went my way Monday. Today I'm going to buy some Tylenol PM. This not sleeping thing I've had going on for three/four weeks now is starting to get annoying. Maybe tomorrow will be better. ha!
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